How To Create Personal Affirmations That Actually Work

I honestly gave up on affirmations a while ago… They just didn’t feel good. It felt like I was lying to myself. I didn’t believe what I was saying, so instead of feeling better about myself, I just felt like a damn liar. I thought I was doing it right, but honestly, I had no idea how to create personal affirmations that actually work.

Until my coach taught me something that completely changed the way I create personal affirmations and I finally understood the true power of creating your own affirmations.

If you’re starting to wonder why you’re still talking to yourself in the mirror every morning to affirm how beautiful, strong, loved and safe you are, read this blog.

Limiting Beliefs & Affirmations

Affirmations are positive statements that are often used as a tool to change or transform your belief system.

Statements like:

“I am beautiful”

“I am loved”

“I am safe”

Should help you change the beliefs you have about yourself that you’re ugly, unwanted, and unsafe.

How to create personal affirmations: The 3 Rules

1. Rule #1: Because your brain focuses on the keywords of how you speak to yourself, your affirmations should be positive (don’t use words like ‘no, not, can’t, don’t, and never).
2. Rule #2: It also helps to add strong words and feelings like ‘amazing’ ‘wonderful’ and ‘incredible’.
3. Rule #3: Affirmations work best when stated in the present tense, as if what you’re affirming is an absolute fact at this very moment.

It’s all about the feeling

But by just following those rules won’t know how to create personal affirmations in a powerful way. We need to add a very important element here, and the most difficult to reach: the FEELING behind the words.

Have you ever said ‘I love you too’ because you thought you had to say it back, not because it felt true at that moment?

Nasty feeling, right? And not very helpful for your relationship with this person.

This is exactly what happens when you use affirmations without actually believing what you say.

Your personal affirmations need to be deeply felt for them to actually work. It’s just like a relationship that cannot work because there are words of love, but no feeling.

The problem with most affirmations is that they’re often too far away from what you currently believe about yourself. You can stand in front of your mirror and state ‘I am beautiful and I am loved’ as much as you want, but if you believe you’re ugly and unwanted, you’re just going to feel like a liar.

So how do you create personal affirmations that feel true to you?

Judgement – Opinion – Observation

The trick is to create personal affirmations that feel true. And in order to do that we need to stay as close to the truth as possible. We have to go from judging ourselves to pure observation. Sticking to the facts.

This might come as a surprise to you, but very little of what we think or say is actually true. We human beings might be able to agree on many things, but that doesn’t mean that they’re not opinions instead of facts.

For example, it can feel true that you don’t have a lot of money, but what you call little money, might be a lot for someone else. Also, maybe you have a lot of money coming in, but you are spending it right away so it often feels like you don’t have a lot of money.

Let’s use this example to explain how you can stick to the facts and change your affirmations.

Limiting belief: ‘I am too poor to travel the world’

Judgment: ‘I am so poor’

Opinion: ‘I don’t have a lot of money’

Observation: ‘At the end of the month there is often no more than 20 dollars in my bank account’ or ‘I get to spend my money on things I want and need’

You can go another route here:

Judgment: ‘Travelling is for rich people’

Opinion: ‘You need a lot of money to travel’

Challenge this opinion to go to an observation:

• Do I actually need a lot of money to travel?
• How much money do I need for this trip?
• Are there people who travel that have less money than me?

Observation: ‘If I don’t spend 200$ per month on clothes, I can afford a city trip in 3 months’

Affirmations for this person shouldn’t be:

‘I am rich’

‘I can travel the world when I want to’.

It should be:

‘I get to spend my money on things I want, like city trips and short travel’

This statement is true, and it inspires action to make things happen because you know now that it’s not a question of money, it’s a question of what you believe something costs, and how you want to spend it.